sevenhelz

about two months ago. It made me really angry, and still makes me really angry if I think about it.

This was when I was first with the recent ex. We were getting the train to Liverpool to go to a haflah, a belly dance meet. We weren't quite sure of the route and were having a drink on the way, which was fun. I needed to go to the loo on one of the trains. No biggie.

I stepped into the next carriage and knew there were gonna be catcalls at least. I remember clocking one or two nervous-looking women and other passengers, but the main problem - there was a bunch of men sitting around a few tables, could've been a stag night, a rugby team or a bunch of squaddies. Something in me keeps saying it was squaddies, but at that point I was a lance corporal and everything looked like a nail. I was wearing little goth girl stuff ie black leggings and little black skirt, little black top, big black stompy boots (reinforced toes but not steelies - still these are my magnums which are often spotted as army).

So I walked past them. And one of them groped me - I remember the familiar feeling of a hand on the back of my thighs and on my bum. I'm not sure if I hit him, but I certainly yelled What the fuck! -and was grabbed by the waist. He tried to pull me onto his lap, I resisted, and stood up in a semi-fighting stance, yelling some more. Bear in mind there were somewhere between a dozen and twenty of these guys. They were all laughing, but there was a definite edge of tension to the carriage that was not just from my anger.

Replaying this in my head once sober, I really fucking wish the next line had been Who the hell are you?! -because, if they were squaddies, they were in fucking trouble. You don't assault a lance jack, whatever rank you are. You don't molest apparent civilians, because you don't fucking know who they are, and hello? Standards and values, respect for everyone?!

In real life, I walked on past, went to the damn loo, and came back with only a moment's hesitation as I resisted the urge to punch the bastard in the back of the head. And they laughed again.